Parenting Styles: Big Daddy Most Essay

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This creates a sense of security and warmth that can ease the child's sense of anxiety. Thus Sonny is not entirely a failure as a parent -- and it could even be added that some permissive aspects of parenting, like allowing the child to choose his or her own clothing, can have positive results if done in a controlled fashion.

Sonny's authoritarian turns, however, are less successful, and are more evidence of his difficulties with the inevitable stresses and downsides to parenting than carefully though-out rules and discipline, like the hard line he takes to the boy's bed-wetting. An authoritarian style, which 'lays down the law', can feel unresponsive from the child's perspective, even when what the parent says is correct. Harsh and punitive methods that do not acknowledge the child's point-of-view can make the child feel hostile, angry, and afraid. Imagine a child who is taught that 'hitting your sister is wrong' verbally but is spanked by an authoritarian parent -- this sends a mixed message that leaves the child feeling frustrated and confused (Cook & Cook 2005, 456). A less extreme example might be that of a parent who tells their child to eat his or her vegetables, 'because they are good for you,' but does not eat vegetables from his or her own plate. The child can easily see through the hypocrisy of 'do as I say, not as a I do,' and the fact that Sonny does not use this type of authoritarian parenting behavior throughout most of the film is one reason why the film can claim that he is a successful parent, despite all of his faults.
However damaging an authoritarian style may be for the child's development, the consensus is that the worst type of parenting style is a neglecting or rejecting home, where the child's needs are ignored and discipline is only erratically enforced (Cook & Cook 2005, 455). This is the type of household Julian left, the reason he 'showed up' on Sonny's door in the first place. A history of neglect or being rejected may be one of the reasons for Julian's anxiety and bed-wetting, given that he grew up in a home with an anxious mother raising him as a single parent, and Julian never knew his real father (Sonny's roommate) for all of his early years.

Authoritative styles are superior because they keep the lines of communication open between parent and child, unlike an authoritarian style, but they still provide guidance and support above and beyond what can be given by the child's friends, unlike a permissive style of parenting. Although Sonny clearly has much to learn about good parenting, the comedy Big Daddy suggests that Sonny will be a good parent, provided he abandons some of his more childish jokes and pranks, because he seems to truly care about shaping Julian's life and making it better.

Works cited

Big Daddy. Directed by Dennis Dugan. 1999.

Cook, J.L., & Cook, G. (2005). Child Development: Principles and Perspectives. 2nd….....

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